Monday, March 30, 2009

Busy busy busy

I went home this weekend for a whirlwind of 3 days! Friday, I was able to leave my "work" at like 2:00 because the student I was going to meet with checked out of school early! YAY! anybody else would do, I wrote off that I was there until 4, and headed on my way to Jasper! I got there the same time my daddy got home from work, and we then went out to eat with Valerie and Jason at Cabos San Lucas! Yum Yum!! That's always fun, because they just love to pick on me about getting married and the honeymoon and everything like that! (as does everybody else in my life right now!)
Well....Saturday, I had the opportunity to play the keyboard and lead worship at a women's brunch thing at my Aunt Debra's church. Mom and I went to that, then we just HAD to go to Belk to get me some shirts. After I got home Friday night, I realized that I had only brought my pants for the weekend, because I was doing laundry and forgot to get my shirts out of the laundry basket after I washed I'm crazy. But that's ok, but it gave me a reason to get 2 really really cute new tops! LOVE THEM! And thanks to mom, they were free to me!
So once we finally got home, the lovely Wilson family was at the house. Rod, Tina and their two adorable boys (ages 2 and 4) were there, and stayed for a while. They left, I had a horrible migraine headache (as I've had lots of lately) and so I took a 3 hour nap...only to wake up with it hurting worse! I then had a mental breakdown with mom, and cried quite a bit, because I hate having headaches like than, and I've had them pretty much everyday, all day for about 2 or 3 weeks! She convinced me it was stress....who would have thought?!? I mean, all I have going on right now is job hunting, getting ready to graduate, planning a wedding, caring for a fiance who lost a dear friend, internship, did I mention planning a wedding??....and ordinary daily stuff on top of that....needless to say, I guess I'd been stressed. So that night, (after going over to Rod and Tina's house, and playing with the boys some more...) I spent some time in the word, actually doint my Beth Moore study, and listening to the Lord assure me that He is in control whether I worry about something or not!
I woke up Sunday morning feeling more refreshed than I have in a LONG time!!! My cousin's wife, Cherish had her baby shower at my grandmother's house that afternoon, so that was fun seeing my entire family and having everybody say "it's getting close...when is your showers....I'd better get an invitation!" And my response was always "Yeah, I can't wait!....April 26th....Oh, you will!" (hoping that mom had them on the guest list, bc I had no clue what their name was!)
Now, today is Monday....I've still decided that I had just better let God be in control. It's so easy to say, but so difficult to do. I did have a headache earlier, but i popped an Excedrin before it got really bad. Maybe they'll go away soon!
Michael is home sick, so that's sad....I guess I'll have to go play "dr" after work, and hope I don't get whatever it is he has....he sounds horrible!!
Hamburgers tonight.....that's always easy! And hopefully the Redbox in Calera will have something worth watching!! I'm never good at picking out that stuff!
Oh yeah...I'm mailing applications in for 3 different jobs today! One to Glenwood, Inc in bham. It's a Family and Child specialist position......and there's a Family and child specialist position at Gateway too! The 3rd one is at Shelby Emergency Assistance in Montevallo!!! I'll be following up on them later this hopefully I'll be posting about landing an interview soon!!!!!!

Thursday, March 26, 2009

comfort in sadness

Michael and I were supposed to begin our pre-marrital counseling tonight, and we were so excited about it. However, after extremely drastic turn of events took place yesterday, we are left in a situation that brings us back to square one....
You see, the man that Michael looked up to in so many ways, and admired for over 2 years....who was going to do our counseling.....he committed suicide late yesterday afternoon. I just got word that he called 911 before doing it, but other than that....that's all we know.
He was a devoted Christian man, and touched so many lives sharing the Gospel of Christ! He was even a pastor for quite some time.... There are so many questions in my head I can't begin to find the answers to....I can't imagine how his wife, children, closest friends, co-workers....even those he counseled may feel. It's an extremely numbing feeling, and I barely knew him. PLEASE lift this family up in your prayers. His wife and children especially! Pray for Michael, as he has lost his mentor, pretty much one of the only CHRISTIAN men in his life that he could talk to. He's pretty upset.
As I write this blog, I can't help but think about how selfish I am. I think a lot of times when something like this happens, I (and I'm sure I'm not the only one in this boat) but I somehow suddenly talk about the person as if they were by best friend. No, I only knew this man from seeing him at Michael's work, and hearing Michael talk about him constantly. But I hurt because Michael hurts, and it seriously bothers me because I know as a "social worker" I will have to deal with suicide often...and that's hard to even think about.

Satan has so many schemes in this world, and I guess he succeeds often. He knows the lies he can feed to us to bring us down, or to cause us to stumble. DC Talk has an extremely old song that says "What if I stumble, what if I fall? What if I lose my step and I make fools of us all? Will the world continue, or will my walk become a crawl....what if I stumble, and what if I fall?"
I think the answer to those questions is exactly what God said to Moses when he was questioning Him about going to Egypt to free the Israelites............God looks at us and says "I AM WHO I AM!" I think that is one of the most comforting things in life. Whatever we need, God IS!

Last night in Bible Study, Beth Moore was talking about fear, and how we shouldn't be bonded by it. She pointed out that the most re-occuring command in the bible wasn't to be good, or to repent, or don't lie, or whatever you may think it is.....but the most common command, the one thing that is said over and over again from Geneis to Revelation is "Do not be afraid!" Don't live in God. Whatever you're going through TRUST HIM! She took about 20 minutes to explain what I'm gonig to try and explain here, so stay with me.
The scripture came from Esther 4:16, where Esther has just asked for all the Jews to fast for her for 3 days, while she prepared herself to enter into the King's presence to ask that he does not kill the Jews as he has decreed. (you've just go to read and study Esther, it's AWESOME!) But ANYWAYS.....In the very last part of verse 16, Esther says "And if I perish, I perish"..."If I die, I die!"
So Beth Moore took that phrase and talked about how we worry and have fear about so many things in life. We think "My gosh, if that happened, then I just couldn't live anymore" or "I could never get out of bed again..." My big IF that kept coming to my mind was "If I ever lost Michael or my parents then I could never get on with my life." She made us take this "IF ______, then _____" phrase and leave the blanks empty. Now think about it...think about the worse thing in life that could happen to you. For Beth Moore, it was her husband not finding her attractive, and cheating on her...but what is it for you (and me)?? Losing a loved one? Being diagnosed with cancer? Failing school? Being jobless in this economy? Never getting married? Getting a divorce? Whatever your fear may be...then think of the "then". Like if it happened, then what...and keep going with then "Then what" until you can't go any more.
You will find that no matter what that worse fear is that you may have.....GOD will always be there. The "then" part of it will eventually end up with "GOD!" He will provide, he will protect, he will comfort, heal, encourage, love, forgive, etc and etc until the end!!
There will be pain and hurt of course, but that never means that the Lord isn't there.

The moral of the story is this: DO NOT BE in the Lord, and live life witout fear!

Tuesday, March 24, 2009


I didn't go on any extravagant trip during spring break last week, but I did have a wonderful time at home, spending time with my parents and getting A LOT of wedding plans done! It's so crazy to me that there is only 74 days till our wedding! That's just over 10 weeks! Whoah! Invitations are now ordered, all the artificial flowers are bought for decorating....pretty much everything is done!!! I'm just waiting on showers, teas, parties, and JUNE 6th!!!!
I can't describe to you the relief I have! Before last week, I couldn't hardly sleep from thinking about everything I needed to get done! And it's finally done! I couldn't have done it without my mom....she's the greatest and I'm so happy she's helping me with everything! She's not one of those that has to have everything her way, and is the boss of everything! Nope, she just lets me make the decisions, but is right there to support me and help me figure it all out! I love her to death!
My dad is actually in wedding-plan mode too! He made some suggestions about the music for my ceremony, and Michael and I are still working on that! We're trying to talk my brother into playing his guitar and singing "When I say I Do" by Matthew West. (you should listen to that song on his myspace's beautiful!) ....but I just don't think Alan will do it. If you see him, tell him he needs to! I know he would do great!

I have right at 5 weeks left of my internship, which blows my mind. I've applied for a lot of jobs with the state personnel department, and I'm open to pretty much anything in the state of Alabama....if you hear of ANY kind of Social Worker job let me know!! I'm on a serious job hunt!

On the spiritual side of things....God is teaching me daily. I'm convicted that I don't spend nearly as much time with Him as I should, and that's definitely a learning process. Still striving to please him in all I do....can't do it alone, so that's why I'm thankful the Holy Spirit is right there living inside me!!

Thursday, March 12, 2009

fun day

Today was my first day of doing stuff all by myself! It was fun! This morning, I met with some parents, and offered them some counseling for them and their son. That went pretty well. I have watched Dorann (my supervisor...which is pronounced "door-ran") do these types of meetings several times, and I finally got to do one alone! YAY!!!! The reason she wasn't able to attend was bc she had to attend court regarding a hearing for a parent that we had prosecuted due to the fact that her kids are never in school1 (p.s. SEND YOUR KIDS TO SCHOOL!) The lady got locked up earlier this week, out on bail, and didn't show for court....go figure!
Well, I went to lunch with Dorann and another lady we work with a lot, Barbara. We ate Chinese (yuck!) but I like eating with them, bc I always learn about things I feel I should know. So it was fun. Well, on the way back from lunch, Dorann was talking about what she was going to teach the kids at the Juvenile Detention Center tonight (she does group sessions twice a week there). Well, we got to talking about it, and I mentioned that I would like to lead a group pretty much she was like "ok, the stuff is in the can do it tonight!" I was a little thrown off by this, but gladly found a lesson and taught my very first group "counseling" session tonight! We gave the kids (only 14 of them tonight...usually lots more) some M&M's and I talked about how each M&M is different, as are we humans. One guy told me I was beautiful.....then about 10 minutes later he was like "Oh, I didn't see that!" and pointed to my ring. I thought that was pretty funny! Another one of the guys said that it was a really good group session, so that made me feel good!
Those kids are all there for different reasons. One guy is there because he got caught with weed in his system. He was telling me that he has smoked everyday for the past 5 months. You can tell, bc he doesn't make sense when he talks..his brain is seriously fried! The sad thing is that he's only 15! It's crazy! One of the girls there just got put in because of a probation delinquency, which could be one of a thousand different things. The court was about to send her to boot camp or something, but she tested positive for a pregnancy test today. Dorann said she's been trying to get pregnant for like 2's sad to say that, but it's so true that you have teenagers out there who are TRYING to get pregnant! Kids raising kids......yeah that's what our world is. But these kids need so much! They need someone to love them, to tell them about our Jesus!
I like going there, and pray opportunities come open in the future for some kind of ministry's so needed! There, and our prisons!! (that's another story!)
I'll leave you with that.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009


So, I'm going through Beth Moore's Bible study called "Esther: It's Tough Being A Woman." This week, the theme is "It's tough being a woman in a mean world," and oh is that so true! I was doing my devotion a few days ago, and one particular thing stuck out to me. I don't have the exact words she used, but it was something to the nature of how satan attacks us a lot of times by our thoughs. He puts things in our heads, makes us worry, or whatever about things.....she pinpointed that and said that it is called "psychological warfare"! I found this to be very true this week as I am made more aware of my thoughts and where they come from.

Psalm 132 says "How long must I wrestle with my thoughts?"

Psam 55:2 says "My thoughs trouble me and I am distraught."

Psalm 94:11 says "The Lord knows the thoughts of man, and he knows that they are futile."

Could you tell David struggled with his thoughts?????

Psalm 139:2 says that "you (God) perceive my thoughts from afar"

Proverbs 15:26 says "The Lord detests the thoughts of the wicked..."

Matthew 12:25 says "Jesus knew their thoughts..."

Those are proof that the Lord knows even our thoughts....more reason to keep a pure heart and mind!

I would like to rest on this next scripture....meditate on it, take it in! It's one of my favorites!

Isaiah 55:8-9

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the LORD. "As the Heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts"

Thursday, March 5, 2009


Ok, so today was EXTREMELY INTERESTING!!!!! Let me just map it all out for you!
1. I just booked our honeymoon to Cozumel and Yukatan, MX! I'm so so excited! However, michael and I are extremely broke now!
2. There was ANOTHER head lice case today (this is the 3rd one within a month!) So we got the call from the irate mom, and then just when I'm trying to get the scoop from the school nurse, we get a call from the front, and the mom is there....with her head lice infested girls! Ahhhhh
Thankfully, I didn't have to deal with them, and things got straightened out, but still! It was crazy!
3. I had lunch with a good friend, Chelcey, and that was very enjoyable. She's getting married the week before me, and we're both Social Workers-to-be, so our lives are pretty much the same! :) It's good to talk about all the stresses to someone who actually has a clue how you feel.
4. Oh, once again regarding the honeymoon.....good news is that we don't have to get our passports! That was a huge relief to me, and will save about $100 for the 2 of us!
5. I'm trying to decided on exactly when to have my lingerie shower. It's technically scheduled for May 2nd, but if we have it then, we can't have it at Mallory's aunt's pool....If it's the week before that (april 25th) some of my friends won't be able to make it. :( Any sugesstions on something fun we could do instead of a pool party on the 2nd would be great!
6. I'm starving, and I'm cooking meatball subs for supper tonight. I've never done this before, so that should be interesting! I'm also going to try and work on that darn puzzle of'll get done one of these days!

I guess that's all......considering I blogged this morning too! Off to cook some yummy supper!!!


Ok, so I'm sitting here at work and I'm seriously falling asleep! I never do that! I don't know what it is these days, but no matter what time I get in the bed, I'm still sleepy! Last night I had really good intentions to go to bed at like 9:30, however stupid Facebook won that battle! So I finnally drifted off to sleep close to 11, which is when I normally go t bed anyways. I serously couldn't get out of bed this morning, and was 10 minutes late to work....same as yesterady! So I thougth I would blog to wake me up for now....Like you care...
Anyways, I've had a pretty good week so far. Michael and I haven't booked the honeymoon yet, but we will before the weekend is over! I'm sure I'll poast as soon as that happens! I've been doing lots of thinking lately about what I'm going to do after graduation. I mean, that seems to be the question EVERYBODY asks these days. Honestly, I have no clue. I tell them that I know I'm graduating on May 9th, and getting married on June 6th. Other than that, I have no clue! Up until this week, I've thought that I would find a job and just work for a year or two, until I was ready to go back and get my Masters Degree at Alabama. However, I just found out that you can only do the accelerated program (which only lasts 1 year) within a year of your graduation. So there we go, my world is turned upside down again! Not really as far as "gosh, all my plans are ruined" but its just kinda like "well, I guess I've gotta go back to school sooner than I thought!"
So I guess I begin the process of grad, that sounds crazy! I do want to work a while, and maybe start in Jan or May of 2010, that's the latest I can start. I can go ahead and get accpeted (hopefully) and then have them put my spot on hold until I start if that makes any sense. I don't think Michael and I will be able to move to T-town, but who knows...I actually haven't mentioned ANY OF THIS to him or my parents. Not that I'm hiding it, but I actually keep forgetting! My only concern is that when I try to get a job (which I'm already on the hunt for) that my potential employers will not want to hire me if I'm about to get my Masters. I don't know how all of it works, but I think I can work and go to school....but I'm just a little worried about that whole thing. I know God has it all under control, and that's exactly why i'm not really freaking out any. He knows exactly where I will be...where WE (Michael and I) will be this time next year and that makes me happy! For now, I'll just seek Him, and see where I end up! I'll apply for grad school, and lots and lots of jobs...and whatever happens happens!
Ok, on to something else.....
Yesterday at work, I had 2 very exciting, but extremely freaky things happen. Not really happen to me, but more like things I found out about some students. One of the students I met with last week while I shadowed a Juvenile Probation Officer (JPO) pretty much had a list all written out of how he was going to kill his family and everybody he came in contact with! I can't go into detail here obviously, but it was pretty freaky! And the scary thing to me is that I was in a room with him and one other person last week....neither one of us had a clue he was having these thoughts! I'm pretty sure he's in the hospital right now undergoing intense psychosocial analysis. The other sad thing that happened was we got a call from a school about a 12 y/o girl wanting to commit suicide. She had a letter written to one of her friends, and the school administration or teachers found it. Long story short, she has a horrible home life.....lives with her grandfother, and hates her life. It was scary to hear about everything she was telling the school people. We tried to get DHR to go investigate things, but they said we didn't have enough evidence for them to go. (ugh!!!!) The school had to call the grandfather to come pick her up at like 4 and make him sign a release thing saying that he would immediately take her to get medical care. I just hope he did it.....and that this poor 12 year old, hopeless girl has found hope....found someone to show her love.....and has decided to keep living.
I guess that's all for now, I'd seriously better get back to work....i'm working on a powerpoint presentation and a paper that's due the week after spring break! I want to get it done ASAP so I won't have to deal with it anymore!!!!

Monday, March 2, 2009

Change in plans

Well, I guess you could say I had an extremely relaxing weekend, and the snow couldn't have made it any better! Saturday I woke up around 11, which was amazing, and stayed in my pjs pretty much all day! I worked on guests lists for all my teas and tried to get addresses for them all. I also looked up plane tickets to st. lucia (our honeymoon destination) and realized that we would need $3,800 to pay off our honeymoon and get plane tickets! That didn't include the $200 we need for passports. To make a long story short, I had a breakdown of realization that there was no way we could get that much money in 2 that meant we weren't going to St. Lucia! :( The good news to that story is that we are booking a 5 day cruise this week. It leaves out in the 8th of June (Which is when we were flying to st. lucia) and goes to mexico and somewhere else.... It's MUCH MUCH MUCH cheaper than St. Lucia which means we can breath a little easier! We're both so excited, and thank GOD for this opportunity!
Sunday was a great day with the snow! Michael and I pretty much stayed inside all day, I worked on the 1,000 piece puzzle we have, and he painted his warhammer game pieces.
This is a new week....a new day, and a glorious one at that! I've decided I'm not letting things get to me. Thanks to all those encouraging, and especially those that commented on the last blog. You don't realize how much that helps!
I guess I'd better get to "work"...