Sunday, September 9, 2012
Leaning on Him
Emotions have been getting the best of me here lately. One minute, I'm so excited about the big move, and another, I'm petrified and crying.
I know Satan is certainly trying to win the battle of my mind, and captivate my thoughts. It's a tough battle to fight these days. And without me filling my head (and heart) with scripture as I should, he does win (briefly) at times.
I put in my notice at work, and as of October 4th, I will no longer be employed with Gateway. I've been with them almost 3 and a half years (which is a long time in the Social Work world), so it's going to be bitter sweet to leave. They're definitely a wonderful company to work for....
With that being said, I've applied for about 15+ jobs in the Huntsville area. I still have several other places to look into thanks to the recommendations of so many people helping me out. Job hunting freaks me out a little...you know, especially since I haven't done it since being fresh out of college, and since I'm pregnant and everything.
I KNOW the law says I can't be discriminated against, but come on...you know pregnant women often are when it comes to job hunting.
THEN comes the financial side of moving.....
We are getting a "moving expense bonus" or something like that from Thehub's work, so that will certainly help. But on the flip side, I think of all of the deposits for our utilities as well as the fact that we're pretty much having to pay rent in 2 places for the month of October...PLUS the whopping "early termination fee" for breaking our apartment lease.
"Any other worries?" you might ask. Well of course!!!
You see, here in the Bham, we have some family support. My brother lives close and helps out occasionally as well as Thehub's mom and my cousin. Without the 3 of them, I'd probably have gotten fired a long time ago from my job for not being able to do everything.
In Huntsville.....we'll have NOBODY!! Thehub's mom says she will come when needed, but probably won't be able to make the drive every week as she does now.
So daycare/ Mother's Day out it is. I've already prepared myself for this, and honestly it's not a huge concern right now. Once I get a job, that will be another story. Did I mention I'm having a baby in February, and that would mean TWO in daycare of some sort?!?!?!
So those are the thoughts that run wild in my head, and bring me to tears everything I let them consume me. But you know what? My God is bigger than those issues. My God knows what tomorrow holds despite all of my "what ifs". I am trusting in Him to provide all of these things.
We know He is leading us to Huntsville, and has opened so many doors already. He will continued to provide for us.
This morning at church, we sang an old hymn that literally brought me to tears. It came to mind one day last week as I was singing EJ to sleep...so I sang the chorus to him. I think God just knew I needed to be reminded of it once again today.
I don' think I've ever had to trust The Lord as I am now.
Leaning on the Everlasting Arms- click HERE to listen.
Leaning, leaning, safe and secure from all alarms
Leaning, leaning, leaning on the Everlasting Arms.
What have I to dread, what have I to fear, Leaning on the Everlasting Arms?
I have blessed peace with my Lord so near, Leaning on the Everlasting Arms.
So I think I will just LEAN on Him.....